Note to my 17-year old self

I will soon turn 27, a number I have always seen as a milestone. When younger, adults made it seem like a magic number, as if you would turn 27 and suddenly be ‘al dente’, successful in all aspects of life. I bet my expectations were very different back when I was 17 and thought about the next decade. If only I could travel in time and give myself some pointers…

  I know you currently think that you are at your best. You have somewhat glamorized the idea that a woman is at its peak of beauty at 17, and that you will just go downhill from there. You are dead wrong. At 27, you still show no visible wrinkles and your body is actually slightly slimmer (adios baby fat!). The only evident sign of aging is your hair, showing a lot of gray hairs here and there, and slowly thinning out. Take care of your body and slow down on the coffee (you will find out that it worsens your acne). No way your high-school self is better than your almost-30 self… get over yourself.

            Now let’s talk boys… I wont tell you much because you will need to go through experiences and heartbreaks to get to a peaceful, happy place in your love life. That ‘exotic god’ of a bad boy that you are so in love with is going to become more of a loser than a lover, and you are just infatuated by him. You will break hearts and have a broken heart more than once. Don’t panic because you haven’t had a serious relationship yet, you will have a couple of them and you will learn how to be in a relationship along the way. Yes, I know you think you want a hot, loud , popular rich guy so you can be a Stepford wife, but you will know better and realize that is not a life that you want. What you are looking for is a partner , a best friend, and someone who loves and respects you and makes you feel comfortable, grateful, and complete. Yes, this exists, and yes, you found one of this rare species at the least expected moment. Stop looking for Mr Big and fearing you will settle with an Adam, you actually need and will find the perfect mix between these two (and yes, you still watch reruns of Sex and the City). Sometimes you will feel like you are in love, but you wont understand love until you meet different people and realize what it really feels like. Never lose respect for yourself. You will overcome a lot of challenges with your relationships, so be brave and know that no matter how bad it hurts sometimes, things will definitely get better and you will find an amazing guy who makes you feel really good- just as you think you would by 27. Toxic relationships are not worth it. Boys will make you cry, and they like to play games no matter how old they get… be prepared and learn the game; you will have to learn when it is worth to stay.

            Don’t be so gullible and innocent. Trust the people who you really love and love you back, but understand that humans are not perfect, and people can really hurt.

            Read more books, seek learning and new experiences. Travel often, and find a way to live in another country. Don’t wait for it, and chase your dreams, you would be impressed at how many opportunities you can pass on when you lose hope. Keep being intense with the things that you love, and turn that passion into something. You will have a good job, but your mind will still roam looking for more and craving for things that make life a little more interesting.

            Be kind and stop being so judgmental. It will get harder to change this as you grow older, so start practicing. Pay attention to the people you love, start a relationship with your grandma, and don’t lose the habit of having a good phone conversation and writing letters by hand.

            Go out, make friends, challenge yourself, and keep focused. You will be where you wanted to be at 27. Not with kids, even though you thought you would have two by now, but you will feel that you are in a good spot and realize that you have a lot more to live and that the best experiences can still be ahead of you in the next decade. There is no right path to doing things, even though you like to think that, and everyone around you will be at different stages and experiencing things that you will learn from too, so be strong, true to yourself, and be confident that life ahead looks really good.

No one cares about high school later in life, so enjoy it and stop caring so much about what others think. Be true to yourself.

Sincerely,

You, at (almost) 27.

If only I could get one of this now from my 37 year old self…

Sedona

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